megastar

pissed.

2010-10-07T18:32:00.001+08:00

for all the mistakes that other people commit,

sahidah and shamella has to pay the price.

thanks for the injustice, dad!

*now i'm starting to think that there's no point in helping others*

just a lil bit.

2010-09-29T19:03:00.002+08:00

at first, i'm not too sure what to write about but since this blog has always been about the boy and i, so i think i should write about us :)

well, things have been on its ups and downs since iker's back in town after a year of absence - that's what relationship is about right? i mean if it's always happy then in my opinion something is wrong somewhere cause life's imperfect. some of the setbacks that we had was relatively not new cause it's the same thing over again and who ignited the fire? eidah of course -.-

it's been 33 months since we're together and i'm enjoying my life with iker being my 'partner-in-crime'. iker has been a dear without a doubt, though he does gets on my nerves sometimes :P i can open up any topic with him, from being the crazily-tk-betol self to being serious, uhuh..u read that right. iker can be very serious at times.

anyway, i've drifted too far from what i intend to write about - my love for iker :)

hey bby, while you're on that big bike, i'm hear waiting patiently, updating my blog after so long. you have no idea how much in love i am with you. if you remember the night we were at yishun dam and the issues i brought up to you, without a doubt, i am indeed of such things. i'm just too afraid of losing you to anyone or anything. you mean so much to me dear. i think if anyone comes along the way, i'll prolly strangle her then apply my unarmed combat on her :) i'm too speechless, i don't even know what to write in here :s

in simpler terms, i love you like how much you love me :)

a love story.

2010-05-27T13:14:00.002+08:00

this is a story of a guy and a girl whose relationship has blossomed till this very day. and here's how it goes...

it was just another beautiful sunday, in the holy month of ramadhan where every muslim refrain from eating and drinking during the day. so there was this girl, eidah, who has kept her feelings for this guy, iker, since a few months back. eidah decided to spill the beans and confessed her feelings towards iker, despite knowing that this is a risky move. and so eidah texted iker,

'ermm saidi, i have something i wish to tell you, though i'm not sure if my actions is rite anot. i think about this over again cause i noe watever i say can make or break our friendship. but i thot i shud just make a move. i'm not since when, but i like you..'

and you know being a girl, rejection is one very sad thing dat can ever happen to oneself. so i thot it was gonna be another rejection from iker cause it took him awhile to reply. talk about anxiousness. his reply went like dis,

'ohk..i kinda sux at replying at dis so paham2 uh..dnt worry..out friendship will go on..depending how it goes, it might go up a notch..'

-.-

eidah being the selenge one between the two was kinda lost with the reply. so is dat good or bad? she actually went around asking the ones she was closer with to help her sought this out. eventually she understood the text and of course, like any typical girl who's in love would do, she smiled the widest smile :)

you will think that after dis, they would hook up in no time right? wrong! iker left eidah hanging puzzled for more than a week. any person would think that the move eidah made was a wrong one, so she decided to break the silence and texted him. only to find out that he had been busy helping his brother at the ramadhan stall.

ramadhan came and go, so did hari raya. they went on dating as if nothing ever happened till one day, after two full months, he confessed his feelings to her. well, of course, she was happy. esctatic to be precised :)

then on 15th december 2007, eidah dragged the reluctant iker to watch a malay production at republic poly. despite not being his cup of tea, he willingly accompanied eidah. it was also just another simple saturday night when they both met up at the bustop near tampines library. iker with his jeans, simple tee and his vans shoes, while eidah in her feeling-ladylike-day dress. upon boarding the bus, they sat on the upper deck of bus 168 next to each other not knowing what to expect. it was more quiet and boring per say cause he was listening to his mp3 throughout the whole journey. yaa yaa, tell me about it right.

let's skip the production watching part, nothing exciting anyway :)

after the whole production ended, we walked slowly to woodlands interchange to catch our bus back home. it was then when the whole magical thing just happened. iker held eidah's hand for the very first time, without any strings attached. he held her hands throughout the whole journey home and kissed her forehead before they went their separate ways.

upon reaching home, she received a text msg from iker and their convo went like this...

eidah (e): watcha doin?
iker (i): thinking about us..
e: ohk..and wat about it?
i: our lil relationship..
e: ok..wats with dat?
i: i dunno..i feel like we are more than just friends..
e: i feel dat way too..wich is why at times im unsure of the status..
i: tuu psal lahh..wat u think we shud do about it?
e: i dunno..what do you think we should do?
i: ermm..take it to the next level?
e: wich level u talking about?
i: the next level whereby we are together as a couple..smtg like that..
e: i wanna ask u smtg..wat are ur feelings like for me?
i: i have seriously fallen for you..
e: *blush* so whats e conclusion?
i: entah..u tell me..u want us to be together?
e: what kinda qn is dat? to be frank, i really really like you..
i: same here darls..
e: do u wanna be with me?
i: i do wanna be with u..
e: i also wanna be with u..so how now?
i: m mind is kinda blank rite now..i think u noe the answer..
e: haha..so can i say that today we are officially together? as in ur my bf and im ur gf?
i: why not? it sounds nice..

so there you have it, that's how eidah and iker became from friends to lovers :)

**there will come to a point of time when ur in a relationship and you start to reminisce these beautiful moments. i just had that moment with iker last night through msn. and thanks to these small talks that made us fall in love with each other all over again. i'm not embarrased to share my love story with everyone cause being in love is a beautiful thing and a speechless moment. this however, is just the beauty of our relationship, of course we have our own downturns as well but that's how a relationship works. a mistake to improve their flaws.

you thank me for walking down memory lane with you last night, im thanking you for creating such wonderful memoirs for us to reminisce. i love you. i really do.

:s

2010-05-05T20:41:00.001+08:00

one drop-dead mistake can take away a lifetime full of good deeds.
i wonder why.

pour the heart.

2010-04-25T15:40:00.003+08:00

as i walked through the busy mall, all i could think of was you. all i could see around me were people clinging on to their partners, happily chatting away or simply enjoying each other's presence. which brings me to this : i really miss your company.

i missed all the good times we had while you're still here.
i missed your warm hands when you would hold on to mine.
i missed the random hugs you would give by surprise.
i missed your cheekiness as we came across someone funny.
i missed having to see you finish up my share of the food.
i missed your laughter everytime we joked.
i missed the times when you would cling on to my fingers as you were riding.
i missed the moment you would look into my eyes and with full sincerity, saying those three beautiful words.

oh i just miss you too much already. nobody would understand what i'm going through cause it's not them, it's me whose in love with you. but it's ok, just a few more months left before you'll be home again. i'll be waiting ;)

how do i tell you that i love you immensely?

cold.

2010-04-20T17:32:00.002+08:00

it's amazing how a simple action can make a huge impact in one's life. and sometimes these things are unexpected. just like the news i received last night.

simply said, it's done. no point for arguments or tantrums. you can't turn back time.
i hope you learnt your lesson and be wiser in the times to come. just so you know, you really disappoint me and that news just makes me shiver. but even then, i still love you.

story of my departed love life.

2010-03-09T10:19:00.002+08:00

dear iker,

29th june 2009. the day you left for brunei to serve the nation for a year. at first, i thought that it would be easy for me to handle, but i was wrong. little did you know, the moment you were onboard the plane and sent me your last message, tears immediately went down my cheeks. i was lucky fida and yati was there to coax me, otherwise i'll probably cause a monsoon in singapore.

the second week after you left, i remembered crying overnight as i sent you a message, telling you how much i missed you. you replied me with simple encouraging and strong words. as days, weeks and months goes by, i endured being apart from you. i knew i was able to last without having you around but a girl has her emotional moments and despite staying strong, i know i've got a weak heart.

i was so used to going out on the weekends with you, playing a fool and being silly with you and when you're not around, it felt different. then quietly, 08th november 2009 came and you surprised me with a call - from your singapore number. at first i thought i was dreaming, that i stared in disbelief and rubbed my eyes t ensure that i wasn't dreaming. you asked me to look down at my carpark and there it was, your kr, staring at me. i looked for you and there you were, sitting and smiling while you talked to me. and yes, i remembered laughing vulgarities to you cause i was too happy that all i could think of was to 'maki' you for waking me up a wonderful and happy surprise. i had a great time with you despite having a small argument within the same week. but time flied and before we both know it, you had to leave for brunei. again. what made this departure a more heart-wrenching event was that you left me for the second time and that to on the 15th november 2009. i swear i cried the moment i reached home. this time it was worse than the first.

as days goes by, we continued communicating until one day, you had to break another 'you-make-me-unhappy' news. like i mentioned earlier, you had to be in brunei for a year which is officially till end of june 2010. but you were just so 'fortunate' that your stay was extended till august 2010.
do you know what that means? this means that after 15th november 2009, we'll only be able to meet 9 months later. that's close to a year! this is indeed a test of our relationship's strength. many have said that they wouldn't be able to withstand a long-distance realtionship and they'll call it quits. many have also said that i was or rather, am strong for this. do they even know how much tears i've cried and how strong my grip was on life? i knew i could overcome all this and i hope i will. it's been close to nine months now that you're away and i'm happy to say that even though i cry on every random nights, i'm still standing strong.

~ absence makes the heart grow fonder ~

i stand strong upon this phrase cause i noticed a difference in you. a good difference. all those small talks of big dreams makes me grin whenever i reminisce those moments.

baby, you have made the deepest impact on my life thus far. despite having one or two mishaps, you still stood there for me. i apologise for ever hurting you while you're away. as much as i don't want time to fly, i really can't wait for august to come. we have big dreams for ourselves so please get back soon safe and sound and we'll do our best to work towards our goal.

nursaidimu'adzan, without a doubt, you're the best i ever had and i just can't stop myself from loving you. you are life and i love my life!

xoxo,

your girlfriend, sahidah!

letters to you.

2010-03-07T22:06:00.003+08:00

can't you see that i wanna be there with open arms?
it's empty tonight and i'm all alone
get me through this one

do you notice i'm gone?
where do you run to so far away

i want you to know that i miss you so, i miss you so

i'm writing again, these letters to you
not much i know
but i'm not sleeping and you're not here
the thought stops my heart

meaningful to the max!

sikit aje.

2010-02-19T18:52:00.003+08:00

it's been super long since i updated my blog. apologies readers :)
i'm currently on attachment at my workplace but it's ending real soon :s after which i'll be on my own, mending my own counters and clearing people. work has been great so far, that too with the help of my mentor :) i meet different and sometimes the same people everyday while on duty. and when that happens, these wonderfull people who recognise me will gimme their widest smile ever.haha!

anyway, apart from work. how was your chinese new year weekend? i had to work over the cny weekends but it's all good :) i met my best girl kyn after quite a long period of absence. we went to watch 'valentine's day'!! it's super goood! how i wished iker was there to watch it with me, no offence kyn but i guess u noe what i mean ;)

so there you go, nothing much i would like to update for now. i love my bestfriend!

and i love you saidi!

...

2010-02-01T14:04:00.002+08:00

work has been good.

but i seriously need to get my life back on track.

oh ya, i wanna watch 'tooth fairy' can??

the one.

2010-01-24T14:49:00.002+08:00

without a doubt, you're the bestest boyfriend anyone can ever ask for.
despite being a mischievious girlfriend, you're still very patient with me.
i know things may not stay the same as before after the wrongs that i've done.

im really sorry for all that i've done to you.
sometimes i feel like i don't deserve someone as good as you but i love you too much to even think of the impossible.
the last few days have been disastrous for me as it may have been for you.
im really very sorry for letting you down and i hope that things will go back to normal asap.
i love you very much bby!

...

2010-01-21T21:15:00.002+08:00

trembling with fear.
clouded with guilt.

please let me untangle my own misery.
i don't wanna hurt nobody.

kumenangis, membayangkan, betapa kejamnya diriku atas dirimu.

2010.

2010-01-03T20:26:00.003+08:00

it's a brand new year but the same old me.

well, not really the same old eidah though. im trying be a better person and use my maturity wisely. dats prolly one of my resolution for 2010.haha!

anyway, i didnt celebrate the closing ceremony for 2009 simply because i fell sick on that day and also because i had no mood whatsoever. however, i welcomed 2010 with a cycling trip to ubin with my fellow cliques. needless to say, despite the hot scorching sun, i had uber fun cause its been awhile since i last cycled.

apart from all the fun i had, i really really miss iker.
i wished he was there at ubin with me, you know like a source of motivation for me to cycle up that steep slope w/o actually pushing it up instead.
or perhaps witness the eclipse with me at changi beach with his arms wrap around me to cover me from the cold..haizz.
sad but true, i actually closed my eyes to imagine that he was there with me :'(

six months is no joke lah kan..this truly sucks! like sucks to the core!!
i will not forget we talked about last night cause that's something i will definitely look out for as soon as i see you step out of the arrival hall..
i might just break though.

what?!

2009-12-26T23:20:00.002+08:00

i've been pretty lazy to update since i started work.
but here i am, nothing much to update except for the fact that,

i miss my boyf very much!

&

no matter how far he is, my heart still belongs to him.
i love him and only him.

so if you see any discrepancy in my fb pictures, please do not make assumptions!
if you're unsure, ask me personally and i'll be more than glad to give you an explaination.

never alone.

2009-12-18T00:08:00.004+08:00

15.12.2009

our second anniversary together.

surprise gift from iker.

my heart bracelet.

interlinking heart pendant.

dear you...

thank you for the wunderfull gifts.
thank you for your everlasting love.
despite all odds, we're still standing strong.
i love you very much!

now that we're two, let's go for three :)

i miss you :'(

of batons & flexicuff....

2009-12-11T21:15:00.004+08:00

ica sp 20/2009.

abang-abang berg tak menjadi ;)

ladies with mr khalid.

yan.wanie.adib.mad.naz.eidah.nat

b.u.c

fierce officers-to-be :)

b.u.c is freaking tiring. my backbone is calling for help already.
overall, i had lotsa fun learning all the different moves. 2 more days to go and its back to the classroom. & now im really looking forward to the b.f.t.

oh and woodlands, here i come!

his name is...

2009-12-08T20:52:00.002+08:00

people often ask me how i was able to cope when iker left for brunei for his national service posting. on top of the overseas posting, it was also about the duration of his stay there.
usually i gave them a simplified answer - 'only god knows'.

on a serious note, i have to admit, it was never easy. not just for me, but for him too. during his confinement period, which is by the way, only two weeks, i already "suffer" for being away from him. so try to picture, just how much more i had to go through when i found out that he has to leave for brunei for a year. well, i may have said this before, but to those who have yet to know, it was never easy for me. let me emphasize, it was never ever ever easy for me :(

being apart from iker was one of the worse case scenario i have to go through. it was something that i have never imagined. it was quite a struggle for me at the start of his overseas posting, but with determination and motivation, as well as advice from my friends, colleagues and of course, iker himself, i was able to cope not being with him for the longest time ever. no doubt, once in a blue moon, i'll find myself in a daze or tears will start falling down my cheeks.

bby, remember the "incident" that happened while u were back here for your home leave? i was being sucha a nuisance for showing attitude to you. & the reason i gave you - sbb eidah jealous lah, what else kan?? haha :p
well, i actually lied. the truth is i was never jealous, i know how close your relationship is with your friends. it was pure selfishness. yes, u got that right. i was selfish over you. you might be wondering why im being selfish. reason being, you are away for such a long time, so when i know that you are back, i wanted you all to myself. i was selfish for your company. being away from me was by far the worse thing that you have done to me.

i'll keep my faith and wait for your return.
i love you.

sikit-sikit je.

2009-12-06T00:47:00.002+08:00

a glimpse of my new phase of life.

secondly, i miss this boy real badly :'(

screwed.

2009-11-28T16:13:00.002+08:00

first, i dropped the bike.
Second, the bike won't start at all despite using the kick-starter and with another student's help.
Third, i changed to a bike that will start only after a few ons and offs.
Lastly, just when everything was ok, my bike had to go up the kerb while i was doing my crank course.
Aaaaaarghhhh!! Bingit bingit!!

Okaay eidah, woooosahh woooosahh!!

update sikit.

2009-11-26T23:30:00.002+08:00

hey wonderous humans =)

&so, after a week of training, i am in desperate need of sleep and rest. i gotta agree with kak aisha, its not the training dats causing the weariness but its the travelling journey to and fro, all the way from paris to choa chu kang. im not complaining ah kan, cause this is what i chose to do, im just expressing my feelings ;)

anyway, apart from training, i hafta admit, i love my team-mates. they're the dopest group ever!! according to our oic, our batch is one of the smallest group and dats the goooooooood thing cause everyone acknowledges everybody else. as usual, every class has its own clown and so does my team.haha! irits people every now and then. oh and he kept forgetting us girls names. i also haf a super tall team-mate, who actually thot i was dis 'rafik' who was mia-ing since first day, and he happily call me rafik from then on.haha!

kak aisha told me that he batch are also very close despite being double our class size and they never fail to plan outings over the weekends, i thot that was actually not sucha bad idea. so who's with me sp 20/09? hehe :)

oklah, actually i dnt know what to talk about today ah kan. there was a bit of disturbance of feelings just now. shall update soon!

put a ring on it.

2009-11-21T21:26:00.003+08:00

i love long walks when accompanied by long talks. i aint kidding you.
you can make me walk miles as long as we have an interesting topic to talk about.
& i have to admit, one of the best walker-talker ever is none other than mama. i know despite our different opinions and takes on certain things, she is by far one of my fave person to talk to. & like any other talks, just now i had an interesting chat with her.
& the topic of the night : engagement & weddings..hehehe. to tell you the truth, this kinda topics gets me really going cause there was once upon a time when i actually dreamt of being a wedding planner :)
i know some of you may think that at this age, its still kinda too early to even talk about it, but frankly speaking, i dnt see anything wrong if you wanna plan early for your future dream wedding. well, of course when i say this, i have my own fantasy wedding =) anyway, let's get back to the convo i had with mama. mama told me stories of how she got engaged and married to baba, which i found out later that she was engaged for less than a year when they decided to get married. wahh..sounds very easy kan. but if you're talking about getting married now, you gotta think of the expenses and stuff like that. back when my parents were getting married, i think the expenses incurred is like a quarter of our expenses these days.
apart from my parent's wedding, till today, i can still remember clearly when both my sisters got engaged and married. it was the day despite knowing that we wont be sitting under one roof again, i was very happy that they are married. i mean everyone of us will eventually build our family. insyaallah.
we usually want someone perfect or rather, those that meet our own criteria, to grow old with. but under those perfections, there are flaws to be taken care of. because nobody is perfect and every flaws makes a relationship better in a way or another. we wont know how our future will be like. but i know deep down, that ive someone in mind who i wish to grow old with. well of course this is just my part of the story, what about yours dear?

pat at the back.

2009-11-19T17:59:00.002+08:00

alhamdulillah.
after almost 3 weeks of home stay, i finally got a call from them.

23.11.09
a brand new start.

goodbye red hair.im gonna miss you the most :(

as we go on...

2009-11-16T00:14:00.005+08:00

the special person who never fails to amaze me...

the 1st time you held my hands, 15.12.07, was the day i realised i loved you most.
you changed my whole life with your never-ending love, your esctatic happiness and most definitely, your awesome craziness.
& it's no doubt that im becoming more & more like you :)

i know you're reading dis bby.
you know i love you very much. & no matter how long i have to wait for you, i have faith in our relationship and i know we can go through this smoothly.
& im really glad we finally have our very own promise ring after so long :)
i hope i'll get some bling bling in future..hehe :p

lotsa love from the dopest girlf of your life, eidah :)

i'll always be there for you :)

last but not least, i would like to thank this beautifull lady for accompanying me to send iker off :)
she's none other than my cousin, nur faidah binte rahmad..

after iker checked-in, we went to have supper at macd and boy, i had a great time talking about relationships with her. Mind you, she's a degree holder in psychology, talk about beauty with brains..haha. she has been through alot. She lost the utmost love of her life due to an accident and now she's engaged to yet another wonderfull soul. she told me stories of how she could relate to things with her arwah boyf to accidents with her current tunang. yupp, she had a collision with her own tunang because she was too busy checking out the scenery while riding w/o realising that her tunang who was also riding was right infront of her..haha :)
anyways, when she told me about her arwah boyf, i feel her. it aint easy losing the person you love most go away in just a speed of light. what's more saddening is, they were about to get a surprise engagement with the help of their parents. i know she had a hard time trying to get her life back on track after the death, she suffered silently for a whole year before she could really move on. but hey, just like me, she's a strong-hearted girl..haha :p

anyway, before i start talking crap, i better get the hell outta here.
peace yaw!

:(

2009-11-05T22:28:00.001+08:00

who am i tryna kid with?

you know you can't hold on any longer.
i miss iker too much already. on the verge of breaking down alrdy :(

words.

2009-10-30T20:53:00.003+08:00

today is my official last working day at starpak management consultants. it has been a great experience working there as a tax assistant. i have great colleagues, awesome bosses and my own private area of zen. when you're in the company, you will feel just like family and there's no doubt about it. we work hard and we play hard.
i had a heart to heart talk with my manager in the morning, she talked bout the issues that i talked to her about, mainly the reason why i decided to resign. it wasn't easy making the decision to really resign, but my supervisor said " some day, everyone will have to leave"..then i thought hey, he's right. it's just like life and death. anyway, on a serious note, i would like to thank my manager, yvonne for those encouraging words and advices. you really make me a happy person just now. you made me feel that there's more to life than just money. you made me feel superior of myself.
as for my supervisor, joshua. you have been the dopest supervisor ever! you have been very supportive of what i plan to do and you never fail to entertain me and stuff like that. im gonna miss being called 'elephant' or 'gajah' at work. i know sometimes i fail you as an assistant. but i must say, the experience i had while working directly under you has been a pleasant ride through my 1st full-time career.
&to all my other homies at work, you have been great and im gonna miss you guys so much!!

on a lighter note, are you guys aware that iker has been away for 4 months now :(
do you have any idea how saddening that is??
truth is iker, i never fail to think of you every single night.
gosh i miss you i miss you i miss you!!

a happy girl.

2009-10-27T21:08:00.003+08:00

alhamdulillah.
thank you dear for making 1 of my wishes come true :)
i shall snap lotsa awesome photos of you when ur back aite..

eidah sayang saidi!!

apart from mr boyf,
i would like to thank big and abg mode for rainbow-ing my hair :)
thank you to aunt rema and family for the simple yet pretty golden bracelet :)

&to those who gave all the best wishes, from the bottom of my heart. thank you so much!!

hmm..ttik and abg feroz, im still waiting for ur gift.heh :p

to those who wish to give eidah a birthday gift, its never too late..my 21st birthday expires next year october k..hee :p

my day dream..

2009-10-26T13:56:00.003+08:00

i day - dream of you: cbr 125..
i shall get hold of you in future.insyaallah :)
thank you for showing this to me nurhayati bte sulaiman :)

i like you.
shall get you real soon =)

*mcm-mcm ehk eidah nk. gi carik keje dulu!!

sunday noon.

2009-10-25T20:32:00.002+08:00

there's alot more than meet the eyes.

make-up less.

eidah tkde keje lain..so layaaaaaaaaan je.

17.10.2009

2009-10-20T11:19:00.006+08:00

seventeen october two zero zero nine.

freaking surprised when these four wonderous peeps came over with a bday cake.
thanks to fath for saying "police" when i took sucha long time to open the door. cuak sekejapan.
i was actually already waiting impatiently for them cause i was already bored. just imagine me, watching tv, dudok mengangkang..i noe burok kan.but im like that lor. never a lady when im home.haha :)

anyway, had a great time with my mira, hilmi, yani and fath. we went to night safari halloween party lah kan!! though we were not full strength on that day, it was fun. i wished iker was there. it sucks being alone cause u'll end up being chased by the "ghosts". tk kelakar ehk!!

anyway, nuff toking, hapie browsing :)

of unkempt hair and a shaking eidah.

my delicious yet keras chocolate fugde cake :p

cause we are crazy like that.

ezzyani.amirra.sahidah.

suke fath!

i love mr tinman!!

ms bootylicious & me ;)

cause i rock like that.

those that were there. im "forever" partnerless one.tsk tsk.

dopest ghost ever.

im too sweet to resist right mr vampire :p

zombie daun pisang.hehe :)

bile saidi nk belanje eidah ben & jerry??

been there.

the tree that grows in an instant. i suke!

ni hantu bodoh punye. dier kejar kitorg lor. it sucks to seat at the back of the tram.

hello!

hantu lidah. i nak hantu tetek :)

hunchback of notre damnned!

ni ah vampire yang kejar aku. u wont like it when he opens his mouth.

irritating riddler.

dier nak terperanjatkan eidah lor. but i saw him so i smiled and walked away.

dier pegang kepale lah.

another mummy.

creepiest picture ever.

more updates soon!

15.10.2009

2009-10-15T14:36:00.003+08:00

if yesterday i said i missed you,
then today i would like to express my utmost feelings towards you.

i get anxious and i still have butterflies in my stomach every time i see you.
in fact, i feel myself blushing whenever i see you.

iker, i love you too much,
it makes my heart beats faster and slower at the same time.

&i must admit,
ur the best i ever had and there's no doubt about that.

*2 more months to 24th =)

love is just a word, but you gave it meaning.

2009-10-14T10:17:00.003+08:00

i miss spending my saturday nights with you till the late hours.
i miss those piggy-back rides.
i miss holding the throttle while riding.
i miss holding your hands.
i miss spanking you with my beg.
i miss those random slaps u will give me when i dare you to. (fer real)
i miss swinging my hair on your face.
i miss you too much to say anything else.

dear iker,
eidah miss you very much.

*december, pls come fast :'(

tkde makne.

2009-10-10T20:13:00.001+08:00

im gonna run this town tonight.

eidah! tkde makne sak dis post!!

i am rajin afterall :)

2009-10-08T12:24:00.003+08:00

& so, a lil update from the blogger after about a week of laziness :p
afterall, i need to prove to iker that im afterall more rajin than he is.hehehe :)

so, last sat (03.10.09), was victoria's surprise 21st bdae party, me and friends were cordially invited by valenrina and to not let vic noe that we are coming cause afterall it was a surprise..we went around parkway, in and out of the same shops and ended up buying her a school beg. i think she needs a new beg :)
not much pictures from the event, but here are some taken for fun =)

she.me

yanah.me

i wanna balloon just like that for my bdae..but i dnt want one..i want ten and more.hehehe :)

bdae girl gets a 'mask' treatment from the cousins.

next up, raya outing with the best gfs and company. it was on sun (04.10.09) and we went to quite a handfull of houses. my house was a miss cause my parents weren't in :( just when i wanted to let ppl see my rumah bunge.hehe :p
anyway, mira rented a car and off we went, from paris and all the way to jurong :)
a special request from cik ana (mira's aunt), "eidah next year raye, bwk bf k.."
ahh saidi, kau bace tak? suke or not, im gonna drag you..weee :)

kite kite.

i suke.

yang mana satu idaman kalbu??

minah bunge :)

bored.

2009-09-30T11:02:00.003+08:00

mama kate kalau muke cantik, pakai ape pon cantik =)

1st attempt to wearing my tudong that way. i suke sebab tk panas :)

i suke john cena.
oh and i like the body :)

eh b, bile badan u nk jadi mcm ni ehk??

glimpse of eid.

2009-09-23T09:21:00.003+08:00

sahid & family.

big say "k candid!!"

adik.big.mama.ttik.eidah

always & forever

eidah ingin mengucapkan selamat hari raya.
maaf zahir & batin. salah silap harap dimaafkan.
halalkan makan & minum eidah alright kekawan :)

rocks.

2009-09-14T16:26:00.003+08:00

without a doubt,
having to hear his voice after so long is the bestest music to my ears.

i miss you very much :'(

*i must say, this is one tough testing patience & endurance test one can ever experience*

speechless.

2009-09-08T22:41:00.002+08:00

...no matter how many words there is here,
can never describe how much i truly love u sahidah...

for those nice things you said to me,
im left speechless.

you made me fall in love with you over & over again.
come back soon sweetheart :'(

bike.

2009-09-07T16:29:00.003+08:00

since when was bike an issue?
show some consideration to those who's single or whose bf is away.

geram je!!

guess who?

2009-09-01T17:06:00.002+08:00

hahahahahahahahahahhahahaa!!
had a goooood laugh upon seeing this. iker look so gay.

you can change ur fb profile picture, but you can't change this =)

&i lost him to facebook.dammn!!

DEAR IKER.

2009-08-24T12:54:00.000+08:00

IT'S BEEN NEARLY 2MTHS SINCE IKER IS AWAY.
I MUST SAY THAT I REALLY MISS THAT DUDE.
HE, WHO NEVER FAILS TO BRING JOY TO MY WORLD.
HE, WHO NEVER FAILS TO MAKE ME SMILE WITH ALL THOSE SWEET SMSES.
&OF COURSE, FOR ALWAYS TELLING ME HOW MUCH HE LOVES & MISSES ME

ONE MTH BEFORE HE LEFT FOR BRUNEI, WE HAD A LIL ARGUMENT. THAT INCIDENT HAS BEEN LINGERING IN MY MIND SINCE THE DAY HE TOLD ME HE'S NOT GONNA BE AROUND FOR LONG.

THE 1 THING I LEARNT, DO APPRECIATE THE TIME SPENT WITH YOUR DEAR ONES. YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN THEY'RE GONNA LEAVE YOU EVEN IF ITS NOT FOR FOREVER. LET THEM KNOW HOW MUCH YOU LOVE THEM OR ASK HOW THEY DO TODAY. CAUSE UNLIKE IN CERTAIN STORIES, YOU CAN'T REWIND YOUR LIFE.

DEAR IKER,
YOU MEAN THE WORLD TO ME.
I LOVE YOU.

...

2009-08-21T12:18:00.002+08:00

those tears felt like lead on my cheeks.

guess, i hafta give up my own happiness for the sake of others.

mellodrama

2009-08-14T21:55:00.004+08:00

she can nvr part from her beloved parrot.

well, she's just camera-friendly :)

what can i say, she's aka miss mentel.

see her eyes. o.o

she's quite flexible.

daddy's lil miss sunshine.

shamella has the same pose when she was bout nayli's age. haha!!

i asked her, " what's ur parrot's name?"
she simply replied, " hmm..parrot name is parrot, burung and bird.."
HAHAHA!! cute ar whad?!

she calls me horsey :)

LOVE.

2009-08-10T17:21:00.004+08:00

i had to ask him to smile &he did.
just for his lovely gf...hehehe :)

*sings*
"&i don't care what they say, im gonna be with you,
im gonna be with you, im gonna be with you"

oh ya, im proud to say, that beret was seasoned by your truly :)
thank you thank you!!

i try my best to catch up with this dude everyday.
&im well entertained even though he's nt physically here.
what can i say, this guy is a born-talented joker.
&i love him to bits.

dork!

2009-08-08T20:04:00.002+08:00

im in love with iker and im a dork!!

hahaha!!
i love amanda bynes :)
u shud catch her in "sydney white"
slumber abis..

but right now, i miss iker real bad.
like really really badly.

this sucks!

my sunday.

2009-08-03T16:55:00.000+08:00

I spent almost the whole Sunday, sitting at home like a goody-two-shoe girl, chatting away with iker. I was left all alone at home, cause I wasn’t wanted by anyone at that particular time.

After hours of chatting, we both went offline and continue texting after iker’s staff parade. That was when we had our open talk. As usual, I was the one who initiated on the topic and I got interested with what iker had to say. He also thinks that this is the time where we should share things and be frank with each other. Well, I just had to agree with him, afterall I like it that way too.

Dear you,
I know ive said this to you before.
But thank you dear for being honest and answering all my questions.
By telling me all those stuff, you made me entrust you more with this relationship. My feelings for you has never fade even with you telling me all those facts. It doesn’t hurt a wee bit for me cause I want to know it best from you, rather than having people telling me anything. I love you!

Okaay now, let fate decide.

fcuk.

2009-08-02T17:47:00.002+08:00

when he's here, you complain.
when he's not here, you also complain.

seriously, get ur mind set on one thing can??
im dead sick of ur total bullshit.

HAPPY 20TH!!

2009-07-27T16:15:00.003+08:00

kecik kecik innocent, dah besar nonsense..
kwang kwang kwang =)

dear iker,
happy 20th birthday sweetheart!!

no bday gifts for this year, yet, cause ur in some faraway land. :p
semoga allah panjangkan umur, murahkan rezeki..
please tkmo naughty2 kat situ, sekali je cukop ahh..
otherwise u'll receive a silent treatment from me :/
anw, i hope that wherever you are, you're happy and living life to the fullest!

i'll see you on ur home leave.which is prolly still a long way 2 go.
but its okaay. ur motivation words seems to work well on me :)
&dnt worie too much bout ibu, she's fine :)

i love you okaay.

xoxo

i think ur company blom byr internet bill, dats why got connection problem.hehehe :p

its all about her.

2009-07-25T21:43:00.006+08:00

all posed for the camera before going in for the ops.

my miss nayli is ever so cute :p

tag pon nk amek gmbr one lor. told ya, shes vain.

after the operation. she slept like what. close to 6hours. HAHA!

day after ops, i cudnt bear to see this pic. she's too young to undergo all this.

bt i know shes a strong-willed lil girl :)

she said: mama, nayli wants to take pic with the fish :)

now u know im head over heels for this girl, cause despite being my niece, i love her so much more than that. what can i say, i watched her grow up..

well, this is a small insight of what she had gone through...

Ptosis is the medical term for drooping of the upper eyelid, which may affect one or both eyes. As the edge of the upper lid falls further, the upper field of your vision may become diminished.

Ptosis may be present at birth (congenital) or appear later in life (acquired). Congenital ptosis is usually a result of improper development of the levator muscle responsible for lifting the upper lid. There are several causes of acquired ptosis. Among them, the most common cause in the stretching of the levator muscle, due to the ageing process. It is not uncommon to develop ptosis after cataract surgery which can sometimes cause the attachment of the already weakened muscle to stretch further.

Occasionally, an injury to the nerve that stimulates the levator muscle can also cause ptosis. Rarely, ptosis may be the first sign of myasthenia gravis, a condition in which body muscles tire easily.

Ptosis is treated surgically. The main goal of surgery is to elevate the upper eyelid to permit a full field of vision, and attempt to achieve symmetry when the patient is looking straight ahead. Patient with congenital ptosis will still have a drooping lid on up gaze and the white of the eye (sclera) will become visible on down gaze. There may also be inadequate lid closure during sleep.

&this lil dude, my prince charming. my 1st ever real boyfriend :)
nw fucking idiotic sak. oh and quite a temperamental guy. just like me. cb!
he almost beat his sister just now :(

ANTIBIOTIC+MAPLE SYRUP=REBDULL!

2009-07-22T16:41:00.003+08:00

IM FREAKING SHAGGED!!
I NEED MY REST!!
I WAS LITERALLY DRAGGING MY FEETS TO WORK TODAY.
&I KNEW I WAS GONNA EXPECT A SLOPPY EIDAH IF IVE NO ENERGY SO I BOUGHT REDBULL. YOU SEE, EIDAH & REDBULL REALLY DOESNT GO WELL TOGETHER.
EVRYTIME I OPEN A CAN OF REDBULL, I FELT LIKE PUKING AND TASTING IT JUST MAKES IT WORSE. ITS LIKE ANTIBIOTIC AND MAPLE SYRUP MIXED TOGETHER. EWWW!!
THE 1ST TIME I HAD REDBULL WAS IN 2007 WHEN I HAD TO TAKE MY NAPFA TEST. &TODAY MARKS MY 3RD CAN OF REDBULL. HEE :)

ONLY IKER KNOWS HOW MUCH I DESPISE REDBULL. IT SUCKS!!

YET ANOTHER TRAINING TODAY. EIDAH TIRED LAH KAN!!

2009-07-21T13:07:00.001+08:00

i miss iker very much :'(
being part-time single really sucks big time!!

told you so...

2009-07-19T14:20:00.005+08:00

i told u my table's in a big mess.

wished you were here.

say.

2009-07-17T12:22:00.003+08:00

iker left for kota kinabalu @ 0530hr just now
for a short leisure trip with his other colleagues.

eidah is stuck here at work with more work piling,
waiting for her to review and such.
i shall show u guys evidence once ive uploaded the pictures.

&iker thinks my pms for this mth stinks.
cause i get angry over small things.
dats absolutely true, im sulking all the way :(
&dats so not sahidah ehk.

*i wanna watch harry potter & crank!! calling for abg feroz and ttik!!
its been long since korang belanje eidah wayang kan :)**

2009-07-15T13:52:00.002+08:00

its dat time of the month where blood will come out and pms will occur.
the blood's nt out, my pms is on.

i was told there's tarian today, so i packed evrything last night despite being sleepy.
only to be told dat there's no training today.
cibai!
i think i shud just give up on them!!
fuck!
sial!

sekian.

2009-07-15T12:14:00.002+08:00

mirror mirror.

eidah.mira

kyn.eidah

bff.

what can i say, they are magnificent girlfriends.
from sengkang swimming complex to sentosa to vivo & ehub..
with great company, im never alone =)

COMPLAIN AHH!!

2009-07-08T11:07:00.004+08:00

AFTER 3 FULL HOURS OF DANCING LAST NIGHT,
IM LEFT WITH A BADLY BLISTERED PAIR OF FEETS.
&TO ADD TO THE AGONY, I FELL IN THE TOILET IN THE MORNING AND FELL DOWN ON MY KNEES. NOW IM LIKE HALF TEMPANG LAH KAN.

I SERIOUSLY THINK THAT HAVING MY DANCE TRAINING & PRACTICAL BACK2BACK ISNT A GOOD IDEA AT ALL. CAUSE IM ALL SHAGGED AND EVERY MUSCLE HURTS. NOT TO MENTION THAT THE DANCE WE PRACTICED FOR LAST NIGHT CAN DEFINITELY MAKE ME LOSE WEIGHT BY END OF THE MTH.

OH YA, TONIGHT IS MY 1ST PRAC 3 & NOE DEEP DOWN THAT IM NT GONNA MAKE IT THRU THE 1ST ROUND, SO EIDAH BEING KIASU HAS ALREADY BOOKED ANOTHER SESSION DUE NEXT MONDAY (13.07.09). FOLLOWED BY ANOTHER HECTIC TRAINING THE FOLLOWING DAY.

MY OH MY, LIFE CAN GET REALLY BITTER.

& MY LAPTOP IS HEALTHY ALRDY.
CANT WAIT TO GET IT BACK SO I CAN WEBCAMMY-CAM WITH IKER.
OH I MISS HIM ALRDY!!

SIDE TRACK A BIT.
I THINK IM CONFUSING SOME PPL AS TO WHETHER I WEAR TUDONG ANOT.
LET ME JUST GET THIS STRAIGHT: YES I STILL WEAR TUDONG BUT AT TIMES I DONT. BUT ITS NOT LIKE IM WEARING OBSCENE CLOTHINGS & SUCH. FURTHERMORE, MY BELOVED PARENTS HAS NVR COMMENT ANYTHING BOUT THIS, SO I CAN ASSUME THEY ARE TOTALLY FINE WITH ME BEING THIS WAY.

SECONDLY: IKER IS AWAY TO BRUNEI FOR A YEAR BUT WE ARE STILL, LEMME MAKE IT CLEAR, WE ARE STILL TOGETHER, IN FACT, I THINK THE DISTANCE IS SOMEHOW MAKING US CLOSER AND STRENGHTENING OUR RSHIP. SO, TO SOME NON-RATIONALE, CANNOT-USE-THE-BRAIN GUYS, PLEASE!! YOU CAN FLIRT ALL YOU WANT WITH ME, BUT GET THIS RIGHT INTO UR BRAIN, DNT EVEN THINK OF HAVING A SCANDAL-AFFAIR WITH ME CAUSE IT AINT GONNA HAPPEN. IT JUST SHOWS HOW MUCH OF AN ASSHOLE YOU ARE, WHICH IS WHY UR STILL SINGLE OR MAYBE NOT. MAYBE UR CHEATING BEHIND UR GF'S BACK. DAMN DUDE, GROW UP!

balanced?

2009-07-06T12:33:00.002+08:00

i went to challenger yesterday cause i sungguh-sungguh wanna get a webcam for myself so that i can msn and webcam with iker. only to be disappointed when i found that ive freaking 38 virus infections on my wakrak laptop.so now, its with the abg to be repaired.
knnccb!!

on a lighter note, i finally changed my handphone.
so now im happily using nokia e63.
i can even use msn on-the-go.

hahahahaha =))
eidah is a happy happy girl.yey!!

with love.

2009-07-03T23:40:00.002+08:00

the above was the last picture taken together before iker has to leave for brunei.
for your record, eidah has been totally fine!
yes, i do miss iker very much but no, i didnt shed a tear. nt yet atleast :)
its been almost 7days now.which means we have 358days away before we can meet.
hmmmmmm...
i didnt say it was gonna be easy, but i'll get through it.
what's a relationship without a wee bit of hardship right?

iker, if you're reading this...
eidah misses you and she loves you alot okaay.
otherwise she'll just go 2 slp instead of waiting for u at msn kk..

xoxo

of 365days.

2009-06-29T11:42:00.002+08:00

my homie's gone.
you'll be missed sweetheart!!

wants.

2009-06-24T10:35:00.003+08:00

1. i wanna go on a date with my babes, namely kyn, mira and yani :)
2. i tagged ayuuu! saying "go shopping with me". we should go after pay day!!!
3. i wanna meet my fellow mango ex-colleagues cause i miss them truckloads :(
4. i also wanna have a sisters day out with my lurrrrvely sisters :)
5. i would also love to take my parents out & give them a treat.
6. but what i don't want is: i don't want 29th to come so soon!!!

oh eidah, please snap back into reality!!

family ze best.

2009-06-23T12:04:00.002+08:00

last weekend, i had a family bbq with my mum's side and i must say it was a blast. i enjoyed myself throughout the whole event. unfortunately for me, i was given the wrong info and so i dropped at car park 2, when the pit was over at car park 7. so just imagine me having to walk all the way there. it was almost 3km sak..but okay ah, im a survivor mah. upon reaching je, i ate lotsa food to accommodate my walking.hahahaha..

played cards with the cousins, cracked lotsa jokes, unfortunately i didnt get to swim cause this budak pandai forget to bring additional undergarments.hahaha..
but i did went cycling the following day with my cousins. we cycled from car park 7 to changi village the 3km up to East Coast Park before i complained that im tired.hahaha..im the oldest mah, so dorg dgr ckp ah kan.hehehe..then, rest for awhile before cycling up to car park 1 to meet iker. he was having picnic with his family too :)

at bout 3pm, we started packing and ate all the remaining foods before we call it a day. i didnt went home though. i went to meet iker and yes, i walked yet again.hahaha.. for someone having mensus, i must say im proud to conquer the pain.hahaha..anyway, officially met iker's mom and cousins for the 1st time. they are 1 crazy bunch also. it runs in the family.hahaha..

ive no pics to post cause i havent got them from ttik. will update once i have them aite.

one word to describe the weekend: awesome!!!!!

what.

2009-06-17T12:07:00.002+08:00

my days are packed with different types of activities this week.

tuesday: malay dance training
thursday: cdc.
friday: cdc.
saturday: cdc & family bbq day!!!
sunday: family bbq day!!!

&it's 11days to go before the boy is leaving for brunei. fcuk!
which means after that, nobody to fetch me from tarian.tsk tsk!!

sayang.

2009-06-15T16:51:00.002+08:00

last saturday (13.06.09), i went to watch gentarasa 2009 with ikersaidi.
he was dragged along by yours truly cause i received a pair of tix from big.hehehe :)
it was a 2.5hrs long show and i definitely had a good time. suhaimi yusof and khairuddin samsudin (if im right) added real humour to the whole show.
atleast i know iker was enjoying that part of the show cause he was laughing along. otherwise you can see him almost sulking.hahahahaha..
we were both left hungry after the show ended and to satisfy my wants, iker brought me to the airport cause i wanted to have popeye for my dinner. thank you dear!!

i really appreciate the small things you do for me.
having to ride from simei to yio chu kang and back to the airport, you sigh yet you just follow suit.
as i've mentioned, thank you for evrything.
u mean the world to me. i love you!!

ok go!!

2009-06-11T13:40:00.003+08:00

i am bloooooooody bored ahh.
no boss, so can slack abit ahh =)
was tryna let time pass...

ABC About You Questions:
A - AVAILABLE: nooooooooo!!!
B - BIRTHDAY: 18 october 1988
C - CRUSHING ON: hmmmmmmm....
D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: greeeeen tea..
E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: ttik.
F - FAVORITE SONG: currently its 'be with you' by akon
G - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS: gummy worms!
H - HOMETOWN: simei.
I - IN LOVE WITH: ikersaidi ahh..
J - JUGGLE: juggle work and play can??
K - KILLED SOMEONE: felt like it..
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE: ntahh..
M- MILKSHAKE FLAVOR: chocolate.
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: four including myself..
O - ONE WISH: ikersaidi to be back on my 21st bday can??
P - PERSON YOU CALLED LAST: ttik.
R- REASON TO SMILE: nice people smile, nasty people frown.hahahaha
S - SONG YOU LAST HEARD: dangerous..
T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: 0625hours..
U - UNDERWEAR COLOR/PATTERN: im wearing black right about now.heeh..
V - VEGETABLE(S): cauliflower..
W - WORST HABIT: frowning.hehehe..
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: none i suppose..
Y – YOYOS ARE: old school..
Z - ZODIAC SIGN: libraaaaaaaaaa...

Random Questions About You:
Spell your name without vowels: shdh.
What color do you wear most? black..
Least favorite color? ntahh..
What are you listening to? crush on 91.3fm
Are you happy with your life right now? if i can improve myself, it'll be better..
What is your favorite class in school? art!!!
When do you start back at school/college? tak tau ahh..
Are you outgoing? i guess soo..
Favorite pair of shoes? the leather highcuts which was stolen.tsk tsk..
Where do you wish you were right now? in the toilet, cause i neeeeeed to peee!!!

THE CANS:
Can you dance? hell yeahh!!!
Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth? noooooo!!!
Can you whistle? nooooo!!
Write with both hands? tak boleh!!!
Walk with your toes curled? i think soo..later i try..

THE DO'S:
Do you believe there is life on other planets? perhaps..
Do you believe in miracles? uhuh..
Do you believe in magic? i dunno..
Love at first sight? i think sooo..
Do you believe in Satan? definitely..
Do you believe in Santa? nahhh..
Do you know how to swim? swimming pool yes. the sea no.
Do you like roller coasters? i would love to ride them..
Do you think you could handle the stuff they eat on those reality shows? i doubt so..

THE HAVES:
Have you ever been on a plane? noooooo!!!
Have you ever asked someone out? uhuh...
Have you ever been asked out by someone? duhh..
Have you ever been to the ocean? hmmmmmm..
Have you ever painted your nails? yeahhh..

THE WHATS:
What is the temperature outside? panas gileeeeee..
What radio station do you listen to? 98.7fm and 91.3fm
What was the last restaurant you ate at? balithai..shank you mama!!
What was the last thing you bought? that bloooody laptop adaptor ahh..
What was the last thing on TV you watched? i cant remember..

THE WHOS:
Who was the last person you call? ttik..
Who was the last person you took a picture of? myself.hahahahaha..
Who was the last person you said I love you to? ikersaidiiiiiii!!!

HAPPY SECTION.
Are you a happy person? uhuh..
What can make you happy? chocolates.definitely!!
Do you wish you were happier? uhuh.why not??
Can music make you happy? yeahh!!!

LOVE SECTION.
How many times have you had your heart broken? hmmmm..
Have you ever loved someone so much that you'd die for them? hmmmmmm...

LOOK AT ME.
What is your current hair color? black beauty.hehehe..
Current piercings? my ears..
Have any tattoos? wish i can have one..
Eye color? black/brown..i dunno.

IN A BOY/GIRL
Favorite eye color: black/brown/blue...
Short or long hair: botak also can ahh..hahahaha..
Height: 165cm and beyondddddd!!
Best clothing: polo tee and jeans maybe??

HAVE YOU EVER
Been to jail: nooooooo!!
Mooned someone: ape tuuu??
Thrown up in a store: i dont think soo..
Laughed so hard you cried: hahahahaha..duhhhh!!!
Cried in school: of course!!!
Done something really stupid that you still laugh at today: uhuh..
Gone skinny dipping: never!!

THIS OR THAT
Pepsi or Coke: coke!!!
McDonald's or Burger King: McDonald's..
Single or Group Dates: depends ahh..
Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate!!!!!
Strawberries or Blueberries: strawberries...
Meat or Veggies: meat...
TV or Movie: both...
Guitar or Drums: both also can..
Chinese or Mexican: hmmmmm..
Cheerios or Corn Flakes: both??
Cake or Pie: cakeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
MTV or VH1:

ngantok.

2009-06-10T15:40:00.002+08:00

they say you're happy when you enjoy doing the things you love.
but i'm both happy and bored doing whatever im doing.
how like that?

work & such.

2009-06-09T19:09:00.002+08:00

i like staying back at work.
after 1730hr that is.
which also means working after hour ah kan.

the best part about working after hour is....
i can be less serious.hahaha.kens kan..
but the truth is, even though im not paid for doing overtime, its the
company i have from my fellow colleague.my supervisor in particular.

ive been thinking bout this for quite a long time now.
i thought this would be one of the good choice.
no, im not running away from my responsibilities nor am i a failure.
i have to consider my feelings bout what i do too.
i am happy here but as days goes by, im feeling rather frustrated with some people.
but never my supervisor cause he's one of the dopest supervisor ever.hahaha..

oh well, time will decide.

timeless.

2009-06-05T12:20:00.004+08:00

time spent: priceless
yet time is ticking.

2009-06-01T12:20:00.002+08:00

sorry for the lack in updates.
my laptop is currently not feeling well.

anyway, im at work right now, supposed to be having my lunch break now,
but i dunno what to eat ehk..hahaha.
ctown is so dull, not many halal eatery. so im practically eating
the same thing everyday.

sidetrack a bit,
after the not-so-nice talkings and such, i feel that we're closer than ever.
how do i let you go now?
ive only 28 more days to go before your departure.
after which, i have to wait patiently till end of year.

this really suck big time!!

devastated.

2009-05-24T16:39:00.003+08:00

he's leaving me for 12mths.
&he's leaving end of next month.
let's just say, we'll be practicing some kinda domestic partnership.

:'( :'( :'(

eidah is a strong girl. she ain't gonna cry.
but no promises ah kan..
i can be quiet cengeng.heh

hikmah.maybe not

2009-05-20T17:49:00.002+08:00

why haven't i been able to see this coming?

like they say,
'ade hikmah, disebalik batu'
but this doesn't seem anything like hikmah to me, it's more like testing
the patience and endurance of one's said self.

to whom it may concern,
*you know who you are*

no matter what happens,
god wills, i'll stick with you and be true to you.
i hope you will to.
it seems as though my words have somehow hurt your feelings
& now i feel as if we are strangers even though we share a mutual feeling.
to my one & only,
i had loved you,
i am in love with you
& i will in many more tomorrows.

my say.

2009-05-19T12:29:00.002+08:00

was it what i said?
or was it what i didn't say?
no.im not asking for sympathy.
but right after what happened.
i was shaking and crying.

why you say such things?

**its been nearly 48 hours now.

heartless.

2009-05-17T21:03:00.002+08:00

You need to watch the way you're treating me
I mean after all the things that we've been through
I mean after all the things we got into
I know there are some things that you ain't telling me

I know you can't believe
I could just leave it wrong
And you can't make it right
I'm gonna take off tonight

Somewhere far along this road, she lost her soul
To a human so heartless

i didn't mean to fall from grace.

2009-05-08T12:06:00.003+08:00

How does it feels when your flesh & blood tell this to you??

"Kalau kau nak diam, tinggal kat dalam kubur ahh"
translation: "If you want peace, live in the grave ahh"

The rest of the story is up to your imagination.
Let's just say, I left home with an ugly puffed eyes, attracting the attention of the other commuters in the train.

silent mode.
yet again.

mati.

2009-05-05T11:35:00.002+08:00

with the rate im given,
i think im gonna die young.
seriously.

i hate running.so stop chasing me!!

babi.buto.sial

tralala.

2009-05-04T16:54:00.003+08:00

it's gonna be the 4th time now.

damn, im lagging behind..

someone please shoot me in the head!!

&&i love these pictures. lawa kan :)
mind you, it was actually night time :)

& to be honest, i miss the other two earthlings,
iker not included.heh :P

meet up soon okay?!

updates.

2009-05-03T18:15:00.012+08:00

due to lack of updates, here i am, giving you my most recent happenings, with pictures =)
first of all, last friday (01.05.09) went out for brunch with mama and adik at simpang bedok together with ttik and abg. then, we went to tampines to get my office stuffs, maklum kate dah "naik" pangkat kan.hahaha..

then mama felt like eating ice-cream, so i treated them to swensens, leaving them with smilesss throughout the dining. heh =)
so enjoy them pictures!!

earthquake!!!!!

you want??

mama and adik. all smiles!!

then, on saturday (02.05.09), met iker to get my helmet :)
afterwhich, we went to fulfill iker's cravings at fish & co. i think iker enjoyed his dinner, unfortunately i didn't quite enjoyed my food cause it wasn't up to my expectation. but im glad the calamari did taste wunderfull. &iker was all smiles after cheating my feelings with the lemon. thanks ehk!! im one selenge gf also lah, i mean which lemon isn't sour right, so i ate the lemon and guess what, i teared till my contact lens came out. suke saidi!!
then iker surprised me, by bringing me to marina barrage!! sukeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!
i very kens one, tak pernah go there before thus the excitement.hah!!
then it was home sweeeeeeeeeeeeet home right iker :p

ikers' definitely hooked.

soup of the day: cream of mushroom.

fried calamari.

ikers' baked ginza salmon

my so-called spicy crawfish pasta

see, i told you saidi hapieeeeeee =))

okaylah, i was hapie too.

eidah aka one-eyed jack loves lemon.

self-timed.

his & hers ;)

my rider.

sealed with a kiss.
xoxo

till next time!!

2009-04-29T12:18:00.002+08:00

hey wunderfull people!!!

my apologies for the lack updates.
i've been pretty busy lately, juggling work, dance & other stuffs.
you may not be interested, but ive been "promoted" to Corporate Secretarial. :)
which means, tax and corp. sec. altogether, double duty in short.

well well, i hope i get increment :)

anws, proper updates will be up real soon!!

onelove,
eidah.

......

2009-04-23T11:29:00.003+08:00

i think my old sickness is coming back.
everytime i eat, less than an hour later, i'll end up in the ladies doing you-know-what.
my gf at work told me that i lost weight and i looked small.

hmmm..i dunno how true that is, maybe you guys can comment when you guys see me ehk..

&ive been having extreme headache these past few days..
is it due to insufficient rest or is there something wrong with me??
im so gonna make a visit to the doctor to have a check on me..

&right now, im thinking of nothing else other than ikersaidi.
he excites me :)

onelove.

2009-04-21T13:41:00.001+08:00

'Cause, you could be anywhere you wanna
But you decided to be here with me
No coincidence it was meant to be '

im outta words.
he hushed me with his love.

special.

2009-04-15T21:51:00.003+08:00

happy 32nd anniversary to my wonderfullllllllllllllll mama & baba!!!!
what more can i say, you both are the greatest human being no matter whot!!

&aren't you both glad to be blessed with your beeeeeauutifull daughters?

=) =) =)

&aren't you both also glad that we're not the married ones?
cause without us, the house will be superrrrrrrrrrr quiet.
hehe.

last but not least.
happy 16th monthsary to us both!!
sayang saidi banyak-banyak ok.

&i think i made saidi ticked just now.tsk tsk..

flipside.

2009-04-13T12:31:00.003+08:00

i tried so hard to be the nice one.
yet everytime i try to be nice, it'll end up in yells and quarrels.

i tried to be so hard to be the bear-the-burden one.
yet everytime i do, i'll end up swallowing my own misery.

i know allah give his people the tolerance to one's limits.
yet i feel as though he's pushing me.

i don't blame allah nor anyone.
i have only myself to blame for all the things that i've done
and those that i haven't.

why is it when i have already done something new, then things just come out of nowhere??
haven't i been a good girl?
or am i trying too hard?

im turning twenty-one this year. i have a full-time career.
does this means that i am responsible for everything?

i really can't take it anymore.

*to my family and friends...
i might be on depression and silent mode from now on.
if you don't wish to get insincere answers from me, please don't talk to me.
im begging you.*

wonder.

2009-04-09T19:20:00.003+08:00

i left somw of you puzzled when i said i had an exam to sit for.

well, im done with it but now i gotta wait for the results.

so, i had to sit for a basic income tax exam.no, even tho its just basic, you're dealing with the government rules people, so evrything has to be right.word for word..

exam was held at tax academy at revenue house.

see. individual basic income tax. intake 5/2008

&all the answers i wrote left me green cause i wrote nonsense.yikes!!

okay bye!

he said.

2009-04-07T20:34:00.003+08:00

bottomline is we are totally fine now.
&yes, i did asked him that question...
he said, "of course"

& just now, saidi said once im done with evrything, he wanna race me.
okay go!!!

commitment?

2009-04-06T12:25:00.002+08:00

i met a beautiful soul last night and this was what she asked me...

"eidah, do you have a commitment with saidi?"
wow!! for once that question has never crossed my mind.

tonight, i'm gonna settle things once and for all.
i pray that evrything will be fine by tonight.
& that 1 question which im gonna ask saidi is...

"saidi, do you have a commitment with me?"

*i screwed today's paper, im feeling rather despaired and definitely stress*

...

2009-04-05T03:47:00.002+08:00

time: 0348am
date: 05.04.09
day: sunday

u must be thinking "what the heck is eidah doing blogging at this hour?"
well, simple reason: i can't sleep!!

just bear with me throughout this whole post okay. im just trying to let go of this feeling dat has been haunting me since the past days till now. &im gonna be frank and clear. so here i go...

earlier today, 04.04.09 (saturday), i was freaking pissed and angry with saidi. why? it's because of certain reasons...

frankly speaking, the only day that i usually meet saidi in a whole week is saturday. let me repeat, saturday. i dont meet him on monday-friday cause i dont want to make him tired and such, knowing that he has to go work and has a long journey to and fro (tamp-sembawang). & i dont usually meet him on sundays because i usually go out with my parents on this very days.
however, he dont seem to be tired cause i will find out later during the night (weekdays), that he is out with his friends, chilling.
i dont expect him to tell me where his whereabouts are evrytime, but wat ticked me is the fact that he will texted me late (in a day) and by the time he reaches home, im already dead asleep. & how do i know? its because i will ask him to text me upon reaching home and the time wud be around 12++ am(midnight) and he has to wake up like at 0615am the next morning to get to work (oh wtf right?!)
& im not blaming his friends for keeping him dat long. seriously. i cant blame his friends when im angry with him.

okay, i noe you guys are prolly falling asleep but please bear with me.thankiss...

anyway, today(04.04.09) at bout 2100hr, his friends are meeting at his place before proceeding to esplanade to meet the rest at 2200hr(dont ask me who cause i really dunno)...well, he did told me in advance that he has a plan with them on saturday and asked if i was goona make any plans on saturday as well. but you see, whenever i plan something, it doesnt go the way i least expected it to be and saidi knows about it and adviced me to just go with the flow(wtf lahh?!!)

but when he told me about his plans, i asked him where they are going and he wasnt able to give me a direct answer. he went like "errmm..........somewhere ah.blom tau lagi" what's up witn the long pause?? if you reli don't know then just say u dont, i dont need the long pause there. so anyway, after he said dat, i made my mind that i didnt wanna meet him cause he's going for his drc at cdc in the morning and even though he's gonna meet the rest only at night, i was already planning to study for my exam.so you might have guessed, end of story but no...

he had his drc from 0800-1300 and i was also planning to go cdc to settle a few admin stuff and i told him bout it and he asked if i could wait for him and of course i say okay lah.its just a matter of a few mins mah.. but he ended his drc earlier and he surprised me at the customer service ctr and told me that he's waiting outside. so while waiting, he went to have a drink with his friend and when he came back, i was still waiting for my turn. i was getting impatient myself cause i had been waiting for 45min and my number wasnt called yet. bu i reamin calm and told myself its okay, ive waited longer than this before.
unfortunately, saidi wasnt patient enough. seriously. i didnt force you to wait for me or send me to nlb or whatever. you told me to wait for you but you ended your course earlier and had to wait for me. & dont start saying things like you've got other better things to do than to wait cause i didnt ask you to even accompany me and if you think you had a plan to drop by your club, then you just go ahead. i can walk myself to the bus stop and take the bus myself. isnt that what i had been doing all this years??
& if you dont like waiting, then guess what, neither do i nor other people. back when you were still working at raffles, i didnt even mind going down at night just to "fetch" you from work and accompany you back home. oh and for your record, i had to wait for you, all alone, at raffles.

why are you still not able to understand my response? you know by now that when something isnt right with me, my response will be different yet you take it lightly.

i feel really bad writing bout this and causing you not to have as much fun as you wished when you are out with your friends but please be fair to me.

you met your friends for the past few days on weekdays. i only ask for a day in a week to just spend time with you. am i being selfish now??

i really love you.like really really really love you. but i cant keep closing one eye and hurt myself on the inside and act as if nothing happen on the outside right.

halo.

2009-04-01T20:16:00.002+08:00

time: 0143 am
date: 1st april 2009
day: wednesday

what was i doing: sleeping like a rag doll (tido mati)

this young gentlemen texted me something so sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeet =) =) =)
&i though it was sucha coincidence that the time i received the msg was
at exactly 1.43 (i love you geddit??) in the morning and on the 1st day of the mth.

oh wells.will update my activities real soon aite.
now must mugg for exam ahh.knnccb!!!

lil somethang.

2009-03-23T20:09:00.002+08:00

As i've mentioned in my few earlier post, on the 14th March 2009, my uncle got married for the second time after a failed marriage with his first wifey. it was a small family gathering, it's like by invites only gituu. only my father's family were invited, not including the neneks and the atoks that is. anyway, it was a nice but bit crampy wedding which was held at Lagun Sari. but well, the food was okay and yes lots of photos taken. but i've yet to get it from the photographer (s). but here are some which i've "stolen" from ttik's facebook.

adik.irfan.me

cik zul & cik emily

the nieces, nephews and the cucus =)

my hapie family :))

from left: big, me, aunt sarimah, ttik & adik

feeling lah tuu..hee :p
.
..
...
..
.
let's side track abit. was viewing the oakley website and look what i found...

beautiful breast cancer awareness shades.
now im contemplating whether to get it anot.
since ikersaidi is getting his ride soon, i also want to feeling-feeling lah.

& & & i found this too...
saw it at an optical shop in tampines mall already but i don't remember seeing this version.
ikersaidi has been giving me the idea that he wants an oakley shades.
that too from my wallet. he didn't want this tho.
but i thot its really nice.
so my ikersaidi, you behave, i'll get you dis.
amai?? on kape??
=) =) =)

sayang.

2009-03-22T16:31:00.003+08:00

date: 21.03.09.

day: saturday.
time check: 1930hr
venue: eastpoint starbucks

have you ever had a shared dream with your bf?
i just did and ikersaidi was amazed and smiling away, with the hope that i'll turn it into a reality.

*& don't be mistaken, my life isn't all about expressing my love for my boyfriend on my blog. i just happen to think bout him at the point of time*

dedication

2009-03-16T15:36:00.005+08:00

After a massive break-up with an ex-beau, i spent nearly 3 years being single. Don't take me wrong, i enjoyed that period of being single cause i was busy being a "mother" to my niece and nephew. I still remember the day we exchanged number through my previous blog, it was indeed the day that i hoped something good would come out. We became mutual friends, met up for movies even though we have never ever ever even talked back in secondary school. I only know him as my ex-beau cousin and yuhtee's classmate. Perhaps we are just hi-bye friends.

However, i made a huge move which i vowed not to do so again cause the first time i did, just made me cried my lungs out, feeling all so rejected. But i went against my will and told him that i had feelings for him. And to my expectation, he didn't contact me until 5 days later. I was already feeling despaired, rejected and all so embarassed with my actions. But i got over those feelings and told myself that maybe he wasn't ready for a relationship or maybe he doesn't like me. So, we contact as usual and me, being my usual self, treated him just like any other guy friend. Until one day, i asked him along to watch my cousin's performance and he agreed even though i knew very well that he isn't into those kinda things. That was the day, he held my hands, making me blushed and all so happy even though we were not even together yet. With nothing in mind, he told me that night that he loved me. He loved me. And he made me think of what he wanted, and that was when i told him again, that i had loved him and im still loving him. Today marks the 467th day since we're together and im loving every single moment of being with him. Yesterday adik told me that she has never seen us quarrel or had any big fights. Well, life's like that when you're with Nursaidimu'adzan. &thanks to him, i became more jovial, happy-go-lucky and try to look things with a better sight. Only Allah knows how much i love him and i hope that some day, something even better will come out of this relationship.

from the day you had even longer fringe than i do...

till the day you fetched me from work...

i still love you no matter what.

watch me watch you

2009-03-11T12:23:00.002+08:00

On 8th March 2009, i went out with my beautiful babes after say 3mths. we planned lotsa things but we ended up doing different things due to unforeseen circumstances. we watched 'watchmen' and its a full 162mins show, do your own conversion. & i forgot that dearest kyn do not, i repeat do not watch gore stuff and unfortunately for her, there were gore-y scenes.lucky she had her tudong on otherwise she'll prolly use my hands to cover her face.hehehehe :) we reached marina say an hour earlier before the show starts, so we watched kpak bing-bing. it was just a coincidence that upon reaching, they were goona start so to past time, we decided to have great laughs with the craziest hosts, suhaimi, cik sal & of course najib ali. after the long 162 mins show, kyn was craving for some kfc, so instead of eating kfc, i ajak them ladies to popeyes since kyn hasnt got to taste the chicken there. oh wells.after having dinner and great talks, we headed home but i must say, this outing is kinda short for us..we need like prolly 2 days or more to catch-up with each other. anyhoos, i had a great time & you girls rock my socks!!

sayang seribu kali sayang :))

kyn & me

you know them alrdy.

a glimpse of popeyes thru mira's eyes

the drumstick & my arms looks just the same kan?? hehehehe :)

after sucha long absence, i thought pictures wud do the right thang.
more pictures shall be up soon, the uncles' wedding's this sat, so ape lagi..its melawa time!!!

my say.

2009-02-28T15:49:00.002+08:00

undergarments $60+
heels $30+
dress $70+

damnn!?!

whats next?
im turning into a shopaholic.

oh & i still need to get sandals =))
i still need to pay bills and with immediate effect,
im supposed to give monthly allowance to adik..
damn i feel so grown-up :(

apologies.

2009-02-23T13:01:00.002+08:00

i would like to take this opportunity to say sorry to Nursaidi fer being such an unreasonable and an irritating girlfriend these past few days. while nursaidi is trying his best to make the situation better, i tried to make things looks larger than life.

i'll be nice to you if you'll listen to me just this once. please. that's all im asking for my dear.

='(

i still love you no matter whot ok kentot!!

tsk tsk.

2009-02-13T09:02:00.003+08:00

Tax assistant
Admin personnel
Accounts assistant
.
..
...
....
...
..
.
exhaustion

i need rest.
& i want nursaidi to give me a huge hug :))

*&of course i want to see you happy my dear mella. ilyvm*
**i don't wanna fight no more**

sunday afternoon.

2009-02-08T17:23:00.002+08:00

Right after i watched the CSI weekend marathon on AXN, i went off to do my "d&t project". The supposedly "project" was actually to do something to nursaidi's buckle because the coat was messy and not-so-nice already. Apparently, he wanted to buy a new buckle but due ti tight budget, he got himself a new belt but asked me to handle his buckle since i was the artistic one between us.heehe :) So, eidah, being the slenge one but i actually know how to do it, thought that i only have to spray the paint over until baba told me that i had to scrap off the remaining coat that was left on the buckle. wahhlauwei!! nk keje senang, end up kene buat mcm-mcm ehk.. After scraping, baba gave me this sheet of paper to make the buckle nicer before spraying it, thus adding on to the whole jobscope. So, in order to let nursaidi know that i did my work, i took some pictures as evidence, cause evidence never lie..hahaha.

smiling amidst the laziness :)

after much scraping and such. i actually thought it looks nice if it remains that way. but since it's not my buckle, therefore it's not my decision to keep it that way or not.

must pose with my artefact.

final product.

& it's back to its original self. looks just like new. all thanks to sahidah ahh.

okay nursaidi, you owe me a big thank you, a big hug and a big shoutout of love for being such a nice gf so as to do what i think you can actually do it yourself. atleast i don't ask for anything that requires money right. see see. im a nice gf ok :)

hee =)

2009-02-06T17:27:00.002+08:00

he's definitely hungry fer midnight snack.hhahahaha :)
he's fulfilled the deal.but i havent :(

however sad to say, buku 2008 dah close account. so love pls get a hold on that fact cause im gonna let go my part of the deal.hee =)

lol.

2009-02-04T13:00:00.002+08:00

i was in the ladies this morning when the pakcik cleaner said hi! to me.
*no, he's not pervert.he just greeted anyone who's in the ladies*
&we had a tiny convo.

pakcik: good morning! eh selamat pagi!! ingatkan cine tadi (i thot it was a chinese lady)
me: selamat pagi cik! hahaha..saye melayu lah.(im a malay lah)
pakcik: oh. pakcik ingatkan kamu ni orang arab.(i thot u were arab)
me: hahaha..melayu singapura lah pakcik.(no lah, im a singaporean malay lah)

arab or whot?!
oklah arab people nice mah..hee =)

happy birthday.

2009-02-03T21:13:00.003+08:00

because he amuse me as much as i amuse him.

my baby boy turns two today.
Ungku Irfan Alamshah, that lil dude who never fails to bring a smile to my face =)

happy 2nd birthday love.i know you won't be reading this but mok wishes you all the best for your future. mok will pray that you'll grow up to be a fine boy and will excel in life.
sayang irfan.muaahh!!!!

loves.

2009-02-01T21:32:00.006+08:00

love.you love my smackers?!!

i love men in his uniform.

*baby, it's coming feb which means it's coming to the 14mth of our r'ship. i love the fact that it's getting longer and stronger. you're my one and only berg sexy horny cheeky naughty or whatever-you-call-yourself boyfriend!!*

welcome to the family, Ian Haziq!! (Ian Hazriq's picture wasnt taken :s)

niiina, the girl who knows how its like to be a kakak.

bluekk!?!

my lil girl is in nursery now.

sentosa was fun.but i wished baba was there.nuff said

say.

2009-01-29T13:18:00.002+08:00

he's happy.
im happy too.

but do you know that the next public holiday is only in April??
which means its two full working months. now that's not making me happy =(

wahlauwei!!!

my kids.

2009-01-23T17:13:00.004+08:00

one pram.two loves.

big.mini big

his.hers

adik.kakak

geram!!!!!!

nayli's dangerous.

acrobat rules.

nayli.irfan

irfan's shirt seems so yummy.

love love me.

kyn, tkmo jealous!!

one two three.

2009-01-18T20:00:00.002+08:00

before.

after

i sayang my boyfriend alot.